When Weekender was in school (about three years ago, or thereabouts), our friend DD used to play a game called Slam, which involved telling people that if your hand was bigger than your face you’d get cancer. And when people put their hand in front of their face to check, he’d slam their hand into their nose. Kids eh?
Anyway, turns out that DD is something of a scientist: German scientists recently announced that if your index finger is shorter than your ring finger you have a higher chance of being alcoholic.
Johannes Kornhuber, director of the psychiatry clinic at the University of Erlangen-Nurmberg, said that the ratio between the length of the index and ring fingers was lower in alcoholics than that of a control group. And apparently if you can wiggle your ears you’re going to be an astronaut.
Panda poo
Still, it’s a bit more scientist-friendly than what Ashli Brown has been immersing herself in of late. The chemist revealed to the American Chemical Society that the solution to America’s imminent oil crisis may be found in, y’know, what pandas do in the bamboo.
Apparently the pandas’ stomachs contain bacteria which are top notch at breaking down lignocellulose – used in potential biofuel crops like corn stalks and wood chips. The pandas beat out previous fibre-digesting termites for efficiency.
Which if you’ve spent 12 months sifting through bear turds as Ashli did is quite a pleasing result.
Beer pants
At last! Underwear can burn off calories! No surprises for guessing that this technology is largely based in Japan; the MXP Calorie Shaper Pants are coated in elastic resin that forces muscles to work harder. Therefore, say the manufacturers, walking for 90 minutes a day can lead to an additional 210 calorie per week burn. That translates, apparently, to a pint of beer.
Now we’re not averse to a bit of physical exercise in Weekender Towers, but we would point out that if we walked for 90 minutes a day we’d damn well deserve a beer anyway. Banzai!
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