After some firsthand experiences this week, I’ve decided to dedicate this column to pet peeves of mine. Cheery, cheery, cheery – but I hope readers can relate.
Let’s jump right in, shall we?
Trying to keep up with the lexicon of youngsters feels like a losing battle. Every time I think I’m on top of it, I hear something unfamiliar that prompts close-captioning activation to see if it’s my hearing or ignorance. Sigma, delulu, rizz … somebody hand me a fountain pen so I can go to my warm, happy place of cursive handwriting.
That being said, there are certain words or phrases that have officially become part of the lingo, and one of them is ‘ghosting’.
Now, we’ve all been in enough one-sided romantic entanglements to know that sudden radio silence usually doesn’t mean that the other person has met some untimely end or they’ve gone to the moon. It’s the coward’s way out of a relationship, rather than coming clean that they just aren’t interested anymore.
Of course, that isn’t exactly the perfect crime in Cayman. If you’re gonna ghost someone, you’d better be prepared to move to another address and then not leave the house for 2-3 months, lest you head to the market and bump into the person you wronged amongst the cabbages.
Ghosting is such a crappy thing to do under those circumstances, because it leaves the other person wondering what happened. Why are they not responding to my calls/texts? What did I do wrong? (On the flip side, I have been told some WILD tales by men trying to get out of a relationship with me – true example: “I’m moving to Palau and won’t have access to a phone for months.”)
This cold way of treating lovers has sadly been around for a while; but now, it seems to be creeping into the professional/business world.
I was talking to a friend of mine in the US who has been interviewing for jobs for a while – with well-known companies. He would apply, sometimes get an interview, or even a second one, and then … dead air. There was no “Thank you for applying, but we’ve gone in a different direction” or “We enjoyed meeting you, but we won’t be moving forward” or even “You are not a good fit for this job and we suggest getting a pair of new shoes”.
No feedback, no courtesy – they just left him to figure out that he probably wasn’t going to be hired. And because he wasn’t even given a deadline as to when he would get an answer, he was left in limbo. Should he keep waiting for them a bit longer? Should he look for something else, even though this one really seemed positive?
I simply don’t understand it. Even if everyone at that company is insanely busy, set up a keystroke answer to send anyone who applied. ALT-F: Unfortunately we will not be hiring you, we wish you all the best in your future endeavours.
Since when is it nearly OK to be so dismissive and rude? I’ve heard from a number of other people after speaking to him that they’ve had similar experiences, so clearly he is not an exception. When did we stop being human beings?
My next peeve is closing hours at businesses and what the heck with early clear-outs?
When it comes to retail or eateries, I’ve noticed a trend of which I’m not a fan – packing up nearly everything before closing time.
Case-in-point: I walked into a small diner in town a few months ago, which – for argument’s sake – say, closed at 3pm. I walked in the door at about 2:40pm. Already, all the food had been packed away from the heaters and the display case; the lights of the same had been shut off, and the person behind the counter seemed annoyed that I had showed up.
Don’t misunderstand – this wasn’t a sit-down, full-meal kind of place. It was a patties, soda, slice-of-cake joint.
Every item I asked about on the menu had been put away (not sold out – put away) and unless I wanted more information about the paint colour they had chosen for the walls, there was no reason for me to remain there.
I’ve seen similar behaviour in some bars. (Some, not all. Holster yer shot glasses.)
Half-an-hour before closing time, the bottles of liquor are being taken off the shelves and put away – well before last call. Fifteen minutes later, I don’t dare ask for anything other than rum with tap water because all the other fancy liqueurs are in a cabinet.
But why? It isn’t closing time yet. As a client, when I start seeing people packing things up in opening hours and I’m sitting there, I feel rushed, like I’m holding them up. Obviously, just my opinion, but I also don’t think it looks very nice.
In the States on a recent trip, we went into a coffee shop 15 minutes before it shut and asked for a cappuccino. The machine had already been cleaned and lemme tell ya, that barista wasn’t going to steam and dirty it all up for us or anybody! But, you’re a coffee shop. And you’re still open.
Tartar sauuuuuuuce!
Is it that owners won’t pay staff after official closing time? I don’t know the answer, but if you’re not offering the service you’re supposed to be providing right up to closing time, how about posting a ‘wind down’ time as well, so we can all manage our expectations? Restaurants often advertise their last seating slot – which makes total sense, they can’t be expected to take orders for a sit-down, three-course meal 10 mins before closing. But a grab-and-go situation should be different.
And, finally … why are we always hearing how we should honour our seniors and take care of them, yet technology and companies vital to their lifestyle make it more and more difficult for them to manage their lives?
My parents, who mainly reside in the UK, are mercifully pretty savvy – and my Dad is good with tech stuff – but banks, apps and even the village Tesco store seem hell-bent on slowly removing seniors’ independence. Every update, every change (“Exciting news: We’re moving from all online to a new app!!”) brings fresh dread and challenges. The problem is, most people have to know how some of these things work in order to stay connected to others. You can produce basic phones with buttons the size of cinnamon buns and screens with 30-point fonts ‘til the cows come home, but video access and easy apps that your children and grandchildren use are really important and not always available on those bog-standard designs. Besides, when something goes wrong, trying to get proper support is a nightmare. Again, my parents use Apple products, so I can help guide them over the phone, if necessary. But, if they only had the Flubbot 2000 flip-phone, what am I supposed to do? I don’t know how to put credit on it, I’m not familiar with the screen layout ….
Just like everything else, as more and more humans down the line are replaced by automated voices, the ones who really suffer are the older generation. I’d like to see a Chatbot survive a conversation with my father.
Online fraud has become so prevalent, that going through security questions with 30 different passwords is the only way to get to your account online. Then you have to try to call the bank. Good luck with that.
Unfortunately, there really isn’t much money to be made in the business of supporting seniors with technology, home visits to assist them, and keeping them connected with their loved ones. Many on a small pension can’t afford it. Yet, it could be the best way to truly respect and honour them. Volunteers who provide these services would be a great start. The important thing is to not cut the older generation out of the conversation, otherwise we’re all ghosting them.
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