Plenty cool tings happ’nin dong tong, still

Geezumpiece! There’s a whole lot of stuff ta do in Cayman, BoBo.

We noticed a few things gwan, starting at Triple Crown Pub on Friday, 25 January with a Traditional Burns Supper. This celebration of Burns Night is always held on or near the birthday of Scottish poet Robert Burns and typically includes haggis and loads of Scotch whisky plus recitations of poetry.

The Triple Crown bash starts at 7pm and includes “Bagpipes, poetry and a traditional; meal of Haggis, neeps and tatties; fine Scotch whisky and loads of fun”. Which cannae be bad.

If you’re not so keen to show everyone what’s under your kilt you might wanna head to Calico Jack’s which is putting on a bash to kick off the long weekend and pay homage to the first full moon of the year. Billy Corduroy is the DJ for this Epic Day Entertainment beano and it runs from 8pm to 2am.

Saturday’s always a playday and Sky Lounge at Jet brings Selecta Renegade and DJ X-Ray to their regular bash which offers reggae, hip hop, RnB and house. It’s a party, we’re told, for “the sexy, smart, grown and the hot”. No troublemakers allowed, mind. So be on your bezzie behaviour.

Holiday. Celebrate.

Cause Monday is Heroes’ Day, it frees up some time on Sunday, 27 January to keep da party flowing. From 2pm a boat leaves SafeHaven for a special Vibestime boat cruise celebrating Mario’s Birthday.

For $15 you’ll get music from DJ Lin, VJ TNT, DJ Vibez, DJ Von HD, DJ Bubbles and VJ Slaughter Rich, all playing out dat reggae, soca, hip hop, top 40, dance and dancehall stuff. Remember, kids, dancing on a Sunday is illegal so don’t be tempted to move your body or anything so subversive as that because otherwise the sky will crack and everyone’s washing won’t rinse properly, so it’ll be all heavy and break the tumble drier when you try and put it in there. You have been warned.

Later that night – much later, at 11.30pm – there’s another episode of Tatt’d Up at Elements. There’s a $1,000 balloon drop for this one and you can show your tats to be entered into a draw to win, well, more tattoos courtesy of Blue Dragon. DJ Von HD continues his busy day as does DJ Lin. Admission is $5 for women ($15 VIP): $10 for the lads ($20 VIP). Indeed, the lady versions of humans get in free until 1am. So there.

Jet’s party – Entice – starts a tad later, at 11.45 to be exact. DJ Royal, Selecta Renegade, DJ X-Ray and more are on the case of this one, which like the Elements bash runs until 4am.

Still want more? You crazy kids. Well, DJ Billy Corduroy, Jeffrey James and DJ Alexi provide the grooves on the Spin Splash Taste the Rainbow boat party which departs SafeHaven at 2pm. It’s OK to dance at this one, because it’s Monday and no earthquakes can happen and it won’t bring down government or lead to rabid teenagers roaming the streets with fire in their eyes and red horns growing out of their heads whilst they drink absinth and spit acid at old people. Probably. Tickets are $25.

Start next weekend early, too, with karaoke at the Office Lounge on Thursday, 31 January from 6 to 10pm. Hosted by Rotaract District 7020, there’s a $5 donation entry fee with door prizes and a 50-50 raffle. All funds raised will assist in hosting the annual Rotaract District 7020 Conference in Grand Cayman from 29 May to 2 June. Phew!