When does retro start? We’re really confused

Weekender often ruminates on post-modernism issues. In an ironic way, of course.

One recent example of this is the strangely compelling fact that there are now 1990s retro parties going on. Surfside Beach Bar on West Bay Road is throwing one on Friday, 1 February from 9pm to 2am.

“There is no better way to celebrate a decade than to throw a party in its honour,” gushes the venue. Bet you didn’t know venues could do that, did you?

“From friendship bands to cell phones and piercings to Hypercolour T-shirts, the ’90s has a lot to celebrate. It’s time to party like it’s 1999, at our Mad Tight ’90s Night: The Remix.”

It’s $10 to get in and $15 for VIP which means beachside bar and servers ‘at your beck and call.’ (Beck. He’s from the Nineties isn’t he. Don’t know who Call is though. Maybe they mean Cicero.)

We would go but we’re going to be busy arranging our ‘do you remember January 2013’ party, where everyone will be wearing those silly clothes we used to put on yesterday and talking about how many influential albums we owned, under an arbitrary set of values dictated by the latest completely subjective Facebook fad.

(Andy Warhol’s famous quote about everyone being famous for fifteen minutes may not have turned out to be totally true, but in these days of social media everyone delusionally believes they have bon mots, pictures and friends so fascinating that everyone must immediately see them and bow down in wonder. And that is why the concept of fame itself has become dissolute.)

Anyway, yes. Back to Friday. We might head to Cayman Cabana that night for DJ Rachel Sehl, DJ Beat Down and Neil Sam at happy hour starting at 4pm.

D-Docta is the dude doing the music on Monday, 4 February at the Roof Top Bar for the Cielo All White Party, which celebrates Mercy’s Birthday Fiesta. Now we ought to note here that the bash, which starts at 9pm, is so-called because the clothes are all white. So wear some. Not all of them, it’ll be far too hot if you do that. Unless you do it to be ironic, of course, which is now in itself a hackneyed approach and philosophically indiscreet. And that, folks, is where we came in and where we are also doomed to depart. Agadoo.

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