Letters to the Editor: Know the difference

Wow you guys are really on the

I got so many responses from the
last column varying from agreement to telling me that it was downright hogwash,
and looks matter in order for us to be attracted to someone.

Thanks by the way; keep the
responses coming! 

More importantly, you’re reading
the column, yay!

And you are also sharing your
thoughts with me, double yay! The counsellor in me is so very pleased.

But based on the response you got
me thinking. Last time I said “say thanks if love finds you”, and now I want to
add to that. You should also know the difference between Mr. or Mrs. Right, to
Mr. or Mrs. Right Now!  Do you know the
difference between the two?  Do any of us
know the difference?  There is an email
that has been going around that speaks about people coming into our life for
seasons and reasons and this is precisely what I mean. When biological clocks
start ticking, women often grab the last man standing, or men end up marrying
that hot little number he met at the bar and wonder why she is still so hot
after becoming his wife; and not in the “hot” good way folks.

Maybe some people come into our
life for the wonderfulness of what they bring right now and that is it. Maybe
they come into our lives to give us attention and make us feel special and
realise our worth.  Maybe they come into
our lives to help us raise the bar. I have been in some crappy dating
situations and always wondered what the lesson was while I was in the middle of
it.   Even through the worst stuff there
was always something to learn. I learned what I did or didn’t want, and through
it all I even learned what my priorities in a relationship are. And I always
say after a man has dated me, it is probably really hard for him to go back to
crappy women, ha ha, but it is true. How can you go back to bad stuff after
being introduced to great stuff — in other words, now that you have been
introduced to something new and wonderful and different, how can you go back to
the days when you knew nothing about it? 
Tracy Chapman writes a song about leaving some things unknown because
once they are known then we can never go back to unknowing it. So maybe people
cross our paths temporarily.  Just maybe
we should honour that and know when to move on. 

Are you teaching someone something
or are you being taught something.  Is
life rich and full with that person that you are with, regardless of the packaging,
or is it not so great?  If it is
wonderful and full of hearts and songs most of the time, then say thanks
because love found you. But if it isn’t, and it is bad more times than it is
good, then look around, see the lesson, learn what you need to learn, and then
love that person with all your heart and might. Then wish them well, but stop
confusing the “right” with the “right now” and know that the “right now” comes
to an end and you were the richer for all the gifts you received from the experience. 


Tell me how your week is going at
[email protected] 

Check out my website at
www.somebodysmama.com and catch the program Cayman Let’s Talk on Cayman 27
every Tuesday night at 7PM.

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