Whose fault is it?

Do you find yourself making excuses for what’s wrong in your life? Is everyone to blame for what’s not working or has gone wrong but you? Funny enough but when we begin to take responsibility for ourselves and our wrongs we will be further ahead. How about making the decision to make today the day to stop making excuses and casting the blame on innocent people. The sooner that we figure out that the guilty party is us, the sooner we will accept responsibility and make peace with it and move on to better and brighter things.

This by all means does not for one second mean that folks have not wronged us or aren’t to blame for their behaviour; but it does mean that we will not give them the full responsibility for our incapacitation any longer and thus the power over our ultimate happiness. In other words, they have made us unhappy long enough and it is time to get them and the wronging off of our minds.

You see I do believe that in our lives, not the child life that others were responsible for, but the adult that we are today, there is no one else to blame for our wrong choices, wrong decisions or mistakes that we have made or continue to make. We chose the wrong guy so we remain upset with him and about him forever and ever. We got fired from a job so we allow that to hinder our ability to get up, dust ourselves off and start again. And some of us are even still walking around crying about the stuff that was done to us as children and allowing that to hold us back from healing and progress.

Do you know how much life we are missing if we do this and can you imagine what our life would look like if you let this blame go? Cutting out the blame game is a choice and taking responsibility for your life is also a choice. We need to ask ourselves: What will it take for me to step away from blaming people and circumstances for any unhappiness in my life?

The cure is simple. We need to grow up, get over it and take responsibility for all of our choices and decisions starting now. This does not mean that people get off easy but it does mean that we do not allow all of the negative stuff to waste away another precious day of our lives. This is no easy feat, and in no way will we not have days of regression but with true desire and a commitment to change it is possible for us to shake it off and get back to living.

If we are ready to start making better choices, and ready to take full responsibility for EVERYTHING in our lives, the good, the bad, and the ugly, then we are ready to change what’s not working for us. And in essence we are ready to start claiming our life! Are you ready; I know I certainly am!

So pain and hurt and hurtful people, please step aside because as the Godfather would say “You’re dead to me!”

And tell me how your week is going at [email protected]

Catherine Tyson is the author of I’m Somebody’s Mama and host of the Lighten Up Show With Catherine Tyson on Cayman 27.

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