Have you ever had a day that you were so happy that you were grinning like a Cheshire cat? A day that you had never smiled so much in your life but, as luck would have it, on this particular day, the sun was just right and all was well with the universe and you were just happy. It doesn’t happen often that you feel absolutely fabulous about everything but this was one of those days in your world and you were hailing up and old friend. And you talked about everything and nothing in particular and then you said your goodbyes and got into your vehicles and went back to your lives. And it was at that time that you caught a glimpse of yourself in the mirror, singing along to your favourite tune, and found it right smack in the middle of it all; yep you guessed it, a piece of broccoli or some green thing sitting quite nicely and securely between one of your very own pearly whites! You are now mortified to only now discover it after your grinning and all that comes with wonderful conversations under the beautiful warm sun in paradise.
And then you thought, “was it there all along; and why did my friend not mention one word of it the whole time?” The question is why we are never alerted of things like this by the people who care about us.
The simple answer is that sometimes people think or assume that we are going to figure things out themselves or maybe someone else might tell us about it. Sometimes people don’t say anything because things make us so uncomfortable that we have no idea how to break it to the person. Although understandable it is often the tragedy.
There are even times when our best friend is going down the wrong road and we cannot find a way to say something about that for fear of hurting their feelings or putting a strain on the relationship. The end result is that we tragically allow them to go or continue on blindly or ignorantly into situations that sometimes mean them harm. Sometimes they ask us what we think and we say nothing even when it is detrimental that we share how we really feel as a concerned person who cares for them.
We simply just hum along with them in their garden and act like all is well when deep in our guts we just want to be honest and tell them the truth.
But we stay silent.
We leave the broccoli sitting snugly in between their teeth and let them go off embarrassing themselves in front of the rest of the world and yet we call ourselves their friend.
It takes love and kindness to tell someone you care about the truth and is very necessary. It can often be the catalyst for their change, growth and improvement. Sometimes we hide from these uncomfortable conversations but we have to accept that the bigger picture is growth, excellence and success. Only your best friend or someone who cares about you will take the time to look you in the eye and tell you the truth. So ask yourself if there is a truth that you need to tell your friend or is there a truth that you have been hiding from and take the necessary steps to rectify this situation.
No matter what stage you are at there is always room for improvement. Whether you are just beginning or you are at the top of your game you can seek out opportunities for enlightenment. These moments and insights that will help you to make sure that everything in your life works, as well as the lives of those you care about.
And for Heaven’s sake if you see your friend with broccoli in their teeth, no matter how uncomfortable you are, tell them before they go cheesing down half of the Cayman Islands without a clue. This, my friend, is the unforgiveable part.
And tell me how your week is going at [email protected]
Catherine Tyson is the author of I’m Somebody’s Mama and host of the Lighten Up Show With Catherine Tyson on Cayman 27.