I was scrolling through Facebook, as one does when one is avoiding important jobs on the to-do list, and browsed some of the pages dedicated to the Cayman Islands and its visitors.
‘I love Cayman Islands’ is a popular one, as well as ‘Cayman Islands Travel Planners’. The latter was initiated by lovely flight attendant – and Cayman Islands devotee – Val Kegel. Based on some of the posts I was reading, I bet there are days when Ms Kegel wonders what the heck she got herself into. No good deed goes unpunished, and all that.
It seemed that no matter what benign question was being asked by a future visitor to the islands, there was almost always at least one member of the page who was ready to take them to task over what they perceived to be a grave misstep.
One innocent poster a while back said they would be travelling to ‘the Caymans’ in a month’s time, and did anyone have any advice about what necessities to bring? Holy cow, did it kick off! I’m not a fan of us being referred to as ‘the Caymans’ either – it should be ‘Cayman Islands’ – but judging by some responses, you’d think she’d ripped up our coat of arms and burned our flag.
Instead of people being kind and gently explaining the correct term, making it (that ghastly phrase) ‘a teachable moment’, some laid into the woman. The question she had asked was completely forgotten; the possible answers swept aside in favour of reprimands. She spent the rest of her time apologising for the error, and when she did fly here, she probably brought suitcases full of ‘necessities’ like toilet paper and bottled water because she didn’t dare ask the question in a public forum again.
I’ve recently noticed that more and more people are posting anonymously, and even preface their queries with a note saying that it might be a silly question, but they’d appreciate advice, and could others be patient with them? I’m not surprised, because responses can be downright vitriolic on these pages. It’s like members are scanning posts, just waiting to jump on someone. And yes, there are trolls, but they don’t represent the majority of those who fire back.
We’ve all been tourists in foreign countries at some point or the other, and found ourselves at a disadvantage when it comes to such things as local languages, cultures and ways of doing things. We may ask questions that seem foolish when practices appear foreign, such as paying to use certain public toilets in Europe. Heck, paying an attendant for squares of toilet paper in the restrooms of Egypt.
Covering your shoulders before entering St. Peter’s Basilica in the Vatican, and no shorts or skirts above the knees; being expected to properly shower onsite before you dip a toe into the Blue Lagoon in Iceland; and, speaking of that country, trying to figure out how to get a petrol pump working at an unattended station at night.
I’ve attempted to force tips on restaurant staff who aren’t allowed to take them, mispronounced city names, and bungled my way through myriad situations. Did I do my homework before we went on vacation? Yes, I did. Did I do enough research to pass a residency test? No, I did not.
Almost every time I wasn’t sure about something, locals were very kind and helpful. Was there the odd person who looked at me askance when I tried to read a menu in French? Mais bien sûr! But I was trying, and I clearly didn’t mean to offend, so they didn’t burn me at the stake in the village square.
It is disappointing to see how quick some people are to chastise rather than educate – not just on these pages, but on social media in general. There are admins that start groups in order to help others.
‘Women in Cayman’ is one such group. For the most part, it has been an absolute godsend and font of information for those new to the island, as well as for long-term residents. It can be heartwarming to see how members rally to assist someone in need, and lemme tell ya – if you want advice on everything from reliable plumbers to where one can source a birthday cake at 10pm on a Sunday, this page is an invaluable resource. Forget AI, the hive can get you answers in record time.
Even still, once in a while, I’ll see a harsh response to someone’s post that has me thinking, “Crikey – that was a bit unnecessary.”
Whence comes this immediate jump to being rude rather than giving constructive feedback? Would they have said that if they were face-to-face in a lift? It’s like when people yell at each other on the road in traffic jams. What is it about being in a car that suddenly makes hurling expletives at complete strangers perfectly normal behaviour?
Going back to those Cayman-centric Facebook pages … when you think about it, social media allows future visitors to interact directly with residents of the islands in a way they never really could before.
Yes, there were message boards on sites, but nothing as easily accessible as what we have today. In one respect, it’s great to have that communication. But also, the veil has been lifted.
When a poster asks about whether they can get US food down here and someone tells them that basically they should expand their palates or just stay home, I would categorise that as unhelpful. How about, “Yes, the supermarkets here are well stocked with US and international brands, and please do try some local food while you’re in Cayman. It’s delicious!” instead? Isn’t this what they taught us in school? Finding ways to get a message across without being condescending, mean or a bully?
Many people’s livelihoods in Cayman are reliant upon tourism dollars, even if their job is not directly associated with the industry. Being an online ambassador can only support the cause, yet it doesn’t take many rotten apples to spoil the bunch.
I saw a recent post from a visitor who had been here with her family and was reporting on their trip. A couple of group members berated her for some of her choices, and by the end of a heated back-and-forth, she said it had left a bad taste in her mouth and she now wasn’t sure if she would want to return.
Censorship is obviously not the way forward, and not everyone with negative responses on these pages is from here … but enough are. Like angry emails we were taught when we were younger never to send until we’d calmed down, the same should apply here.
Let’s do what we can to be helpful and informative when questions are asked, rather than belittle those asking them.
#Caymankind, not #Caymancranky.
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