Hell of a job opening

There are many people who would
claim to have the job from Hell, but a rare opportunity has come up to actually
put it officially on your Curriculum Vitae.

The Tourism Attraction Board has
announced that it is inviting tender submissions for ‘the provision of
janitorial services’ at Hell, West Bay. Responsibilities include unlocking the
washrooms (then locking them again at the end of the day), cleaning and
disinfecting the toilets and urinals, sweeping and mopping floors, cleaning up
rubbish, refilling soap and paper dispensers and compiling lists of needed supplies.

“It’s harder than Hell to keep Hell
clean,” said Ivan Farrington, owner of The Devil’s Hangout gift shop.

“You’d soon have the place cleaner
than Hell, but I don’t know how the hell you could get the job. You’ll be doing
a hell of a job of cleaning up our famous attraction up here at Hell.”

Tender submission
forms are available from the Tourism Attraction Board at the Crighton Building
on Crewe Road.

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