Melanie Thomas spent three weeks in quarantine with her daughter Avery, before the 2-year-old was cleared to go back to nursery. In a guest column, the working mum, who had to isolate for another week herself, gives her insights into the experience…
Stage 1: What the ?
We got the call Friday afternoon, that sentence every parent was dreading: “There’s a positive case at the school, come get your kid and get them tested immediately.”
As a working mother, my brain is in constant overdrive – what will we have for dinner, how many paper towel rolls do we have, what birthday party is this weekend, I forgot to text that person back, did I reply to that work email… and so it goes on.
In moments like these, all that goes away and everything simplifies.
Go get her. Call husband. Book a test.
I got to the school and she seemed totally fine. No symptoms. We’re fine, everything is fine. Aware of the regulations around COVID protocol but not well-versed in the specifics, we had to look into what we were supposed to do now. Line up in town for a PCR test, go to our GP? We realised we could lateral flow test at home (and miraculously we had access to tests) so all 3 of us did that as soon as possible.
Hers was positive immediately, both dad and myself tested negative. OK… now what? Sorry… wait…. What? 14 days? Quarantine? With my TODDLER? Have you MET her? How does this even work? Thank GOODNESS my job is flexible and I can work from home.
THEN YOU REALISE……….. YOUR CHILD HAS COVID! This illness we’ve learned to DREAD for the past 2 years.
OK – assess, she seems fine. Here….. we……. go.
Stage 2: Angry & afraid!
The first few days are a blur of anger, fear, exhaustion, confusion. At this point, we have now learned that mum and dad have to LFT for 10 days. We have to force ourselves to take it one day at time.
She seems to have a small sporadic cough at this point but nothing more. I’m starting to feel a strained throat, not a normal sore throat, it feels as if I’ve been up all night screaming.
Mum and dad test again – I’m positive, dad still negative (of course), so now what? We divide and conquer. Dad picks his side of the house, mum and kid pick theirs.
Masks. Handwashing. More handwashing. So much handwashing your hands start to literally crumble.
You go through the motions of OK – now I have COVID and my toddler has COVID and my husband doesn’t so
a) we want to keep it that way so he can still go out and get groceries and be safe but also
b) why am I so mad at him for not having COVID?
It’s the weekend so kiddo doesn’t seem to be highly aware of what’s going on and seems to be feeling completely fine. Friends are leaving video messages for her – she’s delighted. All of a sudden there are a few more toys, art supplies, puzzles, a little more Netflix – so she’s actually delighted. And can we just have a moment of appreciation for bubbles.
Thank you, whoever invented bubbles, they are the star of our COVID lockdown.
Stage 3: We got this!
This is where things start to get tough. Parenting while sick is the worst, parenting while sick with COVID is even more terrible.
Lower any expectations you had on life for these next few days, weeks, months – who knows at this point. If you thought quarantine might be a chance to do something productive – think again.
That new recipe – forget it. Organising the pantry – forget it. All energy goes into putting one foot in front of the other. Easy meals. Easy activities. Just try and keep it as easy as possible.
Full disclosure – I’m fully vaccinated, as is my husband – and this thing knocked me OUT. I do have asthma so there’s that, but wow, I truly didn’t expect that. I was SICK. It didn’t plateau and come down like most flus, it was relentless for me.
So parenting with COVID? 0/10 – do not recommend. We are lucky and grateful that we have space – we have a patio and a backyard. We spent most of our time outside. We had a bit of a cold snap too which could not have been timed better for us.
There was no schedule. We stayed in PJs all day, we blew bubbles, we painted rocks, we watched far too much Netflix (Minions, Secret Life of Pets and Trolls on repeat), we coloured, we had dance parties, we blew bubbles, we played in the garden, gazed at our breadfruit, did I mention bubbles? We had tantrums, both her and I…. and then……. We recovered with more bubbles.
All the while, she is still completely fine.
Stage 4: What day is it?
I genuinely lost track of anything that resembled time and day. Everything was based around meal times, nap time (where I crammed a day’s worth of work into 2 hours) and bedtime, sweet, glorious bedtime.
I’m not sure about all toddlers but mine is an Energizer bunny. I wish I could just have an ounce of what she has. I was prepared at the beginning with all these activities and art supplies, and the school sent home a bunch of stuff too but, alas, in true toddler fashion, she found her entertainment elsewhere:
1) blowing bubbles and popping them with a plastic paint scraper
2) kicking the dog toys around
3) crumpling up small pieces of paper and dropping them through an empty paper towel roll and
4) throwing all her stuffies from one spot to another and then hiding under a blanket with mum and “all the guys”.
These days are just for existing. It’s around here I started getting worried about exit PCR tests but we shoved that down and hid it (hopefully well) from her with popcorn snuggles on the patio.
Her mental health was my number one priority (meanwhile mine took a hit – let’s all be honest…. #mumlife).
This blurred segment of quarantine with a toddler was hard to get through but I can look back now and smile. We did have some fun in between toddler town meltdowns and mum feeling overwhelmed meltdowns.
Also by this point we felt OK joining forces again, so dad could take her into the backyard to play to give mum a moment with a hot cup of coffee.
Stage 5: Game winning goal!
We ended up having to have 2 PCR tests each by this point (don’t get me started on the current policy of exit testing but that’s a rant for another day) but our girl FINALLY got her clearance to go back to school 21 days later!
TWENTY. ONE. DAYS. LATER.
For those who know me, know I am the least athletic person that you’ll ever meet. Husband on the other hand – athlete. When we got the letter saying our girl was free – he just looked at me and said, “If you ever wanted to know what a game-winning goal feels like, this is it!”
He immediately put her in the car and took her to the beach to watch the sunset. Meanwhile mum had the longest shower and best glass of wine on the patio – patio time without blowing bubbles, what even is that?
I am still in lockdown but how much better I feel as a human being knowing that my girl is free to go back to school, spend time with her friends and socialise can’t be described. What a trip this is.
A huge shout-out to the Bodden Town Civic Centre testing clinic – you’re all angels on earth.
I’m on the mend, just a cough left to deal with. Back to my – what’s for dinner, how much toilet paper do we have left, what can I pack in her lunch, is her blanket clean, which PJs to pack, does her school bag have a change of clothes, charge your phone it’s nearly dead, set the coffee maker, turn on the dishwasher…………………
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